so do the steelers give the refs blowjobs at halftime or after the game?
Everyone agrees they like your mother better drunk
we've been doin it since '07. it's like married sex now, were both comfortable so neither of us really tries anymore, we just do it because it's convenient
I just want him to slap me with his dick and call it love
They said an hour before I even see a doctor...and they noticed the shots tally on my arm.
Is eating fries while lying on the floor bad for you?
If I choke and die at least I will have been doing something I love
Ask her if it hurt when she broke through earths crust as she ascended from hell
I have experienced an excessively hairy ballsack in my mouth...and it was horrifying. I keep feeling it in my mouth now. It's like hairy ball PTSD.
I woke up at like 4 am with an old Korean woman cuddling me. I assure you she was not there when I went to sleep.
Whenever someone tells me they've never met a bisexual, I feel like a majestic fucking unicorn.
ANNA YOU PEED ON THE STREET. LIKE NOT EVEN SUBTLY. YA JUST SQUATTED IN THE MIDDLE OF THE HIGHWAY. And you flashed your tits to oncoming vehicles to try to get them to pick us up
I'm a lady who knows what she wants in life, and that's uncommitted dick.
If sex isn’t mentioned at least three times at the dinner table, I’m not interested...
That time of your life is like a blur to me. There was churches, car fucking, and conservatives
& I came downstairs to find my whole family discussing the fact that I have a vibrator, which my mom found accidentally....
Randomize
