Great. Don't do shady things like that ok?
Just saw a girl trying to crack an egg with her butt cheeks. I think I know what we're doing thursday night.
dudes here are drinking wine, and not in the forgivable 'just doing this to get laid' way
I just found like 5 packs of sparklers. If someone doesn't get set on fire tonight I am retiring from party hosting.
It's been a wonderful constant drunkeness. We played Marco polo with some random like 8 yr olds in the kiddie pool.
Travelers Top-Tip: Europeans do not appreciate being repeatedly referred to as "gypsy" regardless of how good your Borat impression is.
Drunk Tina signed up to be part of the crew team and got a text from the captain telling her there's practice tomorrow. Wtf
Oh god. I asked to "play his sexaphone" which I though was a super sex way to say "let me blow you". He fucking walked home at 4:30am
I'll be home soonish I need 4th of July sex, it's the American thing to do.
She had sex with a starfish painted on her face. Thank you Halloween
Dude I used amphetamines responsibly today though. I snorted one in the am for work and then chewed one in the pm for other work. I'm an adult.
How do I send someone an apology text for giving them a lap dance in the middle of a party last night?
That car ride home was pretty awkward. Your feeling up the girlfriend to the guy who's throwing up out the window. Thanks for that.
Im drunk taking pregnancy tests with this really hot girl...i dont know what is happening
I told him to take his man panties off and take the fucking Jaeger bomb already, so no to a 2nd date
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