every time I hook up with him I think about the fact that penicillin was a mistake too... and look how well that turned out. It makes me feel just a little bit better.
is it bad that the only reason i knew what antidote meant in class today, was from years of playing pokemon?
So I feel really bad about last night...can i give you a blow job and we call it even?
Since when do you wear a bracelet?
Not a bracelet. Half a pair of handcuffs
come in to starbucks and ill make you a 4loko latte before theyre banned
you yelled "who's job is it to keep me from breaking shit" and then immediately ripped off the molding as you fell down the stairs.
Just hit a cone using a lit sparkler. Tastes like I might die but it was magical.
Attn: you have now used your free, one time admission to pleasure town. Thank you for visiting I hope you enjoyed your trip. All future trips to P.T. Will cost you full admission price. We have different pricing plans to accommodate different situations, and remember it is more of a bartering system than a set price. Your patronage is always welcomed and once again thank you for visiting and have a fantastic evening.
We told our cab driver we'd give him 3 grand if he pit maneuvered you guys in your cab.
I mean turning down birthday sex is never the answer
Can I color on your dick again?
Dude, you need to man up. You passed out before a PRESEASON game. It's a long season.
Instead of getting a taxi some gay black guy drove us home. He is trying to break into the taxi business
Way to promote small business.
You realize that if you get murdered while we're talking, I'm gonna have to explain to your next of kin why the last thing on your phone is a picture of my boobs.
Shit happens dude.
Shit doesn't just HAPPEN on the kitchen floor you asshole.
Randomize
