i woke up with my moms heels on underneath your couch cushions
you want 1 or 2 eggos?
i just licked mashed potatoes off my blackberry. i'm not even ashamed to admit that to you.
he said the way to his heart was through his stomach, i told him if he wanted to eat my food he had to eat my kitty
smooth operator
There's so much relief when you realize you wake up in your own bed
He came in my eye, I lost my earring and all of his friends saw me topless. Happy New Year to you as well.
Just crossed the line from casual pregrame to public intoxication. Shotgunning in a bus shelter.
Are we talking about who knows if I'll get naked pictures of you with a broadsword or who knows if I'll be surprised?
I did something similar high once. I stopped like 30 feet in front of a stop sign because I felt like it was running towards me and I started crying. Got out my car and hugged it and told it not to run away people need it.
Literally this kid just told me he's not planning to live past 30. Then he hit himself with a frying pan.
His encouragement of my recreational drug use is the backbone of our nonrelationship. That, and rough animal sex and loud music.
day drinking caused me to be in bed at a decent time. can't complain.
He said he wanted to lick the breadcrumbs off my chest
I hit an all time low we ran out of coke and I met up with my dealer at 8 in the morning for a re-up. great customer service though.
Fuck you. Fuck this party. I just wanted to be pretty with a cute little tiara and boys sucking my tits, now i have a hangman game drawn on my face and jello shots in my hair.
I wanted to give you a great birthday party. You know I did.
cinco de mayo stole my toenail
cinco de mayo stole my virginity.
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