Porn is love you can see.
Thanks for last night. Sorry if i was obnoxious. I respect your morals and i wouldn't want you to lose your virginity to a drunk girl in your mom's prius.
I don't think everyone found it as funny as I did... Nothing says "Party's Over" like the sound of a pump action shotgun.
I think making out with someone could be the cure to all my problems. That or more cowbell.
Normally this is when girls give blow jobs. That's how you mentally condition them to put up with PMSing, because they see the shinny blowjob light at the end of the tunnel.
I'm two guys short from fucking the whole baseball team and one is gay. I will be successful by the end of this month.
She failed the Charleston discretion test, although puking in her armpit was very innovative.
Like, you've got the smoothest dick in the west. Do you moisturize?
Yes I do
I can't. Currently naked covered in Nair trying desperately to catch his cat that rubbed up on my leg.
I hate that cat.
How do I go about this? "Hey, its my birthday in 40 minutes. Would you like to come over for some sex? Also, please bring snacks"?
honestly dont worry about it, its not the first time ive injured myself on a potted cactus during sexual relations with a woman
Oh, in response to your "does dating get better" question...I feel like penises are getting smaller nowadays. Its been several years since I saw a good 8+ incher.
I gave you keys to my house and drugs. This must mean we're in a relationship.
I just wanna inform you guys that the first pregnancy scare of 2016 is over...
I've struck affair-gold. He's hot, he's ripped, he doesn't want a relationship, and most importantly he won't have to ask Gods permission to bang me like the last religious nut job did.
Randomize