Doug is wearing your sports bra fyi
Girl next to me just ralphed in a bag. Congrats class of 2010
She's trying to master eating with her feet. She said it was be she "always has to be prepared."
I was talking to some girls while you were falling off your bar stool into the person next to you.
Don't worry I drank 7 more beers & brought home a guy that bit me at the bar.
Not drinking has really freed up a lot of my time. I made a bracelet yesterday. I miss bars.
She screamed at us, "You guys need to wake up and smell the beer-bong!"
Would seriously like to slash his tires but then I feel like I'd have to deal with him longer.
my suitemate came in my room last night and flashed me. and then she just walked away. deff transferred to the right school
Right now you and beer are my only friends.
All I know is if i get a free preview weekend of HBO then I am recording Kindergarten Cop.
You told his date she had the tits to be a stripper and the personality to be the pole. Of course he's pissed off.
Sooo I ended up ugly crying at the drive thru window at 10 pm last night....how was your valentine's day?
Well what did you order
I'd just like to take a moment now to apologize sincerely for getting drunk and making an as of myself at your Christmas party next week. I'm especially sorry for sleeping with your baby sister.
Ladies night is a gift from god. If it weren't for that, I'd probably be selling my eggs for booze money.
Randomize
