i wanna do a homemade sex video in sepia and pretend were in the early 20th c
I had a dream you and I were having sex. It was pretty romantic.... until you started pulling out toys.
I've decided, even as much fun as it sounds, I don't care for his sodomy box.
Also, the wait staff kept prematurely clearing my Manhattans. Not sure if it was an oversight or a hint.
Hey bring in backup. its going to take a lot more beer than we think to fill up the water bed...
halloween is the only time that anne boleyn, the joker, a cowgirl, and a mexican man complete with sombrero and poncho can all hit the same blunt
I had 5 long islands and 2 alien brain hemorrhages…I am entirely certain that the "power hour to finish the night" idea was just too much.
the cops accepted 42 wallaby way Sydney. and the cops, and cab driver accepted the new address. please tell the win i am experiencing
My liver and my bank account can't afford another all nighter. Help.
You dropped my mother on the dance floor. She has a concussion. You didn't apologize. Don't speak to me for a while.
Do the right thing and go fuck yourself off a cliff
So this is my life now? Laying in bed texting about Hulk penis?
I told the cops they couldn't arrest me until they found my shoe. Now I have the grant county cops looking for my heels by the rail road tracks.
Anyone who does not consider cereal and wine as a balanced breakfast needs to leave immediately.
Was make out with a 38 year old lesbian on our bucket list? if it was you can go ahead and cross that one off.
Randomize
