i dont care if i had to wear a dress to fuck her, she was super hot and i stand by my decision
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i loe djcudia fjxos rue.
He was pretty wasted I guess, but the crippled guy threw the first punch it was awesome
These shoes are way too nice for a walk of shame. Its how I keep myself in line.
Sudden memory flashback: drunk me outside ripping my tampon out and throwing it into the neighbors yard, silently cheering 'time for sexxxx'. I sense a dangerous pattern emerging
Only you could walk of shame to a childrens pirate themed birthday party
The dorm having an ice machine is their way of inviting us to make mixed drinks.
Also I found and fixed my beer gun.
It was like a square peg in a round hole... I've never seen one shaped like a stick of butter...
I ran into him drunk, barefoot, at rite aid and he said I looked "stunning." Yeah, Stunningly shitfaced haha
I am no longer drunk enough to crave tostitos
Sooooooo this guy just asked me if I'd be interested in a threesome... I'm considering bc I would get to hang out with his dog afterwards.
Also I literally googled "how to fold socks" so that's how my day is going. How's yours?
If we were unicorns we would fly together. Like in a pack. A pack of flying unicorns
So I hung out with an australian but woke up with a British man in my bed does that make me culturalized
Randomize