Mario Lopez is the poor mans Ryan Seacrest
I just realized I'm not towing a trailer. I thought this whole drive home I was towing a trailer. Wow too high
Also I may have a condom stuck inside me, but I won`t know til I check the couch coushions.
my boss just offered me his leftover salvia im not sure if it was a trick question
thats because you have standards... and i have a thing for guys that give me free drugs.
he went at my nipples like a starved dog.
Add caroling to the list of things we need to do in an elevator
i want to have awesome sex and feel fuzzy.
Feel better punkin. Your balls will be gently resting on my forehead in no time
I believe the question is can one ever have too many vibrators?
Is this like a preordered booty call?
I admit it could have gone better but look at it this way, since I broke the urn you don't have to worry about spreading the ashes.
IS NO AN EMOTION BECAUSE THAT'S WHAT I'M FEELING RIGHT NOW
I just bought a butt plug on Amazon prime day and you're the only person I felt would appreciate that decision
I guess I can check "drink alone in the dark" off my bucket list
Randomize
