Situation: He got it in my eye, how long do I let it sting before should start to worry?
that's why i date skinny girls, they don't realize how small it is.
I even made an effort to dress like a conservative young lady who doesnt black out and throw up in her bed regularly today.
i may or may not have just grinded on your dog thinking it was my boyfriend
We were playing flip cup on the nice dining room table. Losing team had to shamwow the table in between rounds
what part of “beer fountain” do you not understand
He just helps fat girls get exercise. One walk of shame at a time.
I'm currently day drinking, studying and making corn. Don't tell me what I can't do.
I can't believe I've come to a point in my life where sex for a birthday present is acceptable
I'm now drinking beer through a straw. By order of the bartender.
That amazing moment when the girl in the passenger seat decides to strip you while your driving.
I'm going to smoke the pathetic stems and miscellaneous particles that weren't good enough for all my other bowls because its all I have left. This is my bag's Rudy moment.
There's a chance I told a cop that I was ready for him to strip I may have even taken some ones out of my purse and stuck them in his holster
just the thought of you slurpin down noodles really rustles my jimmy
you suck at sexting
His face will be in my vagina later so I'm willing to forgive.
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