i don't know what kind of porn he watches.. but that is NOT how you do it...
i wish exes would disappear into a world where we never have to deal with them again, and they can just create drama for each other. Then if they wanted to talk to us, they would have to apply to get a "visa" to come back to our world.
I just realized that if I marry him I will have the same last name as spiderman. this makes my decision so much harder.
It's 3 am and my parents just came up the driveway in a limo. They didn't leave in a limo. I'm scared to even ask.
Oh, and for future reference, telling a guy that your ass is too tight for anal is like painting a bullseye on it.
Nothing says "get your life together" better than waking up in a tub full of your own vomit. Twice. In one night.
Suuuuuuper drunk and just sang fuck her gently to the chiminea. I'm in bad shape.
Ive waited a long time for a girl with prescriptions like yours.
Is it going to be one of those nights where I shouldn't wear my contacts so everyone looks more attractive?
btw, whatever u do, dont try and take that towel away from her..i tried, it got ugly..she said some things im sure she regrets.
We are horrible
Yeah but we're also awesome
she broke a 50 dollar bottle of alcohol. then passed out in front of her car and got sprayed by a skunk
Ahhh, the bane of our relationship.... His mediocre penis
I was so drunk I got motion sickness from sex.
It’s only loud for those who wanna get loud. The bowlers are protected.
Randomize