Oh KT! There was no tea in those Long Islands...
Is there a nice way to say "I like you, but I hate your dick?"
this is like black Friday for my dealer. I'm literally standing in line.
my mom and grandma just had a splits competition. slut runs in the family
Not sure if jager bombs can cure tuberculosis, but its a theory im testing as we speak
Counseling BFF to break up with her BF. We will get that 3-way
So some sort of safe sex group just flash mobbed the bar by putting condoms over people's beers.
They left screaming as a hale of lubbed up condoms rained into their hair.
I'm eating cake, naked, in bed. I am GREAT at being single.
strip vodka pong is never a good idea. I saw into his colon when he picked up the ball off the floor
He's super sweet. I feel like I'm dating Elmo. If Elmo had a 7 incher
this relationship shit is hard. like i'd like to be able to watch veep without him trying to dry hump me. also im drunk and its 11 am so
I just started the bonfire using a tampon. Who knew they could have multiple uses?
And then before we had sex he was quoting space jam to me
I remember walking into a bathroom stall that had a couple fucking in it and giving them a condom and a thumbs up and then leaving
There was a woman who drank mouth wash to get drunk during her supposed detox...this is def the internship for me!
Randomize
