This girl is very crazy
She's one of those compassionate ppl
So everything I said on this seemingly endless date offended her
Girls don't like it when you cum inside them and then discuss baby names.
I just watched a woman break three wood planks with her boobs. I don't know how I feel about that
Found out that it IS actually possible to get road head from somebody in the back seat
Dude, you need to understand there is a fine line between "guilty pleasure" and in the closet gay
It's ok that you're screwing someone else while trying to get back with me, I'm banging three girls while I ignore you.
U took a sewing needle to his nipple
Psshh,
You started drinking at 2:30, did you really think you would be able to remember?
I was going to ask the people in the kitchen to keep the volume down, but they're cooking pasta at 3 AM and one complimented me on my polka-dot nightgown. They're high. No volume control.
A good drinking club with a running problem, improves endurance in both I have observed this evening.
2 for 1 beer results in multiples of 2 so what should be a beer or two becomes 4 or 6. But running, alleviates the need for a DD.
We need to talk about your improper dealings with the town drug dealer.
If my birthday doesn't end with my panties hanging from a ceiling fan, I'm holding you responsible.
Just paid my weed guy with a check. I've got this whole adult thing down.
He fucked me while wearing his night time breathing machine mask. Does this mean I joined the dark side and he is Darth Vader?
She's walking down the sidewalk with a notebook, a pencil, and a box of cheez its while yelling profanities at small animals.... I'm going 2 ask her where she was before this.
Randomize
