She's hot, in a Megan Fox with Down's Syndrome kinda way. Like, she'd win Miss Deliverance Pageant
At least she's the hottest one. Oh well, it's all about stats
Five Mah tais Laser and i skill have not drunk dial you
I think we should get high on adderall and nair each other again for New years.
I like you as a friend, but I'm in love with your dick.
He left in the middle of the night, he left his shoes behind and stole my doc martens..size 6 female. Wtf?
whats our policy on dating high schoolers?
we dont have a policy but im pretty sure the state of michigan does
420 is off to a bad start. Mark wake/baked WAY too much, and he has spent over $50 on the claw machine in the grocery store.
You are the tramp this city needs, but not the one it deserves.
Holy shit, I just successfully took and sent a boob pic AT MY DESK I have conquered an entire new level of skill.
You mistakenly try to piss in a cactus bush ONE TIME and are forever dubbed cactus ass
You thought there were zombies attacking us so you tried to tuck and roll out of a moving vehicle. Also you should consider wearing underwear
At one point, the bartender wrote out the words "please kill me" on some receipt paper and slid it across the bar to me.
Btw, you owe me. One (1) orgasm.
This is a life or shit situation. Grab me toilet paper asap. This bathroom is fucking out. This is not a test. This an actual emergency and I am not joking.
You threw a beachball full of vodka at me and yelled I CHOOSE YOU then ran
Randomize
