What you up to?
Having coffee. Getting eyefucked. Eyefucking.
Full throttle
Some guys are relationship guys. Not our niche.
I think I deserve the nobel peace prize for discovering that one should smoke before drinking instead of drinking before smoking.
her name was charlotte except you kept calling her chatroulette and yelling at her to show you her boobs
I just discovered the Reese's pieces and sourdough bread sandwich. No signs of coming down.
She thinks I should try and corrupt him and take his virginity. While I do love virgins, I'm a little too lazy to put in the corruption effort right now. That's a summer kinda job.
She has an inverted nipple. She told to play with the normal one until the other one pops up.
Dear future Eric, sorry about the Everclear. Sincerely, Eric +2 shots E.C.
Just to update you. I am dead. So your probably gonna have to find a new roommate
what the hell is that chicken wire thing she's holding?
An artistic expression of her stupidity.
Yea not today, I ending up taking a shit behind a tree last night.
Just made a floating bacon boat for the hot tub. This is what America is all about.
I'm just gonna go with where the wind takes me. if it takes me to his dick, so be it.
The moment you tore my shirt off I knew I wanted to spend the rest of my life with you
Hey guys.. So I accidentally broke the front door last night
I just dropped a chicken nugget on the floor and seriously prayed that it would be ok....I think this job is making me crazy.
Randomize
