he texted me telling him i gave him the clap. but i think he gave it to me and i gave it back to him
I started drinking at 10.30am. Ive got a solid buzz, ive decided holidays are to be treated like gamedays
I just randomly started counting the number of guys that I've hooked up with that are now gay. 11.
Guys, I'm sleeping in the BOYNTON LAUNDRY ROOM. if you can, come let me out in the morning as I have no keys. I might be in the study room possibly. DON'T FORGET. I will be trapped
I even got my dealer to make gluten free special cookies ;-)
Whiskey and an unstable home life is apparently the fountain that 20-something boys like to drink from.
Starting the weekend with a pair of pants on which the zipper wont stay up. Is this a sign of things to come??
I was worried he'd break you after the hiatus your lady parts had to take from social interaction.
Wait... All I had to do was ask for a sandwich and you would have come over
She makes margaritas with lemon-lime 5 hour energy..thats brilliant
and you were wondering how she got into Harvard
Its like I've been given a sexual blank check.
When the sex is so good, you need three fans and have to chug a gallon of water after
Like you haven't hit rock bottom until you have had to throw your own turd out a window
How my distance relationship is going: he's trying to sext me & I'm stuffing pizza in my face.
I woke up with eight different shoes in my bed what the hell happened last night
Randomize
