Sometimes I think its so cool that a dick that has been inside kate moss has also been inside me. So exciting.
There's some strange man with hair that keeps talking to us. I'm scared.
This is how horror movies start. Going to bar with strange hair guy. He's paying. Bad idea?
Ditched hair man. Got free cab ride to market. Want food. I win.
We can get Dustin to help us. I think he'd be good at luring girls into a dark alley.
your youtube search consisted of "food slideshow" and "the angry beavers"
I either just got cockblocked or saved from a lengthy court case so I'm kinda conflicted about how my night went.
If Megan asks I spilled my water water all over her. I pissed on your roommate. You're welcome. I expect you to keep that on the down low. Seriously tell her the water thing
I sent two dick pics to a wrong number and one was in .gif format so it was helicoptering all over the place. I single handedly ruined a child's life.
When I die I just want my headstone to my name, date of birth-death, and TEQUILA!!
I don't care what the Chinese zodiac calendar says . . . 2015 is the year of the cock!
there's people who respect me enough not to bang on my bed and i think that's beautiful
He said my vagina is harder to escape than the Temple of Doom.
Really though. It's your life, live it how you want
And I do mostly. Which is why I'm now drunk in my room writing erotica
There are two guys here arguing over Pearl jam and Nirvana. 1991 wants its argument back.
She tied me to her bed using her honor chords. Thank god for graduation!
it’s my vagina i can do what i want to
Randomize
