i can't believe he got me to come over to him by waving a natty light at me.
The lesbians are drunkenly meowing in the hallway again. This is the shit I'll miss at home.
did you seriously make the punch out of vodka and food coloring
Ate apple sauce off his penis. Nutritious and slutty.
I woke up using a pile of socks as a pillow. I think theyre clean so thats a plus.
He made me meet him in the baby department of walmart where he was waiting with his pregnant girlfriend. Time for a new dealer
You have no idea how pumped I am. I literally plan on dying. You're in my will
I thought I could grab a hold of my stream of urine. So she left pretty soon after that.
So note to self oboe reeds soaked in Apple Rubinoff sound GREAT.
She called to say her plane was running late and i had 30minutes to get to the airport for bathroom sex
HOW MANY BOYS NOT ONLY APPROVE OF YOUR PLAN TO BECOME POCAHONTAS, BUT WANT TO MAKE SURE YOU DO IT RIGHT? One, the answer is one, and he is the best and if anyone ever tries to steal him I can assure you they will never be heard from again
Come here I'm naked
And I want mozzarella sticks
of fours songebofy did dknt stop believing
how legible are my texts
He just blew a .079. Jesus loves him THAT much.
My alcoholism is old enough to drink.
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