OMG Im so trashed fishy! im sitting hereon my bed wif mcdonalds n i look like david hasselhoff!!!!!! kill me now
They made my facebook status "I got my period!!!." Every guy I've had sex with at college liked it.
how can i incorporate a boy scout uniform into what i do tonight?
She was drinking straight whiskey out of her peacock shaped vase again.
i just added no after every hockey player in my phone..
He was uncircumcised
It was like inception. A penis within a penis within a penis
We got back from Mcdonalds and literally 5 minutes of being in your room, you wanted to go back because "We haven't been yet."
Just fucked a MILF from Alaska. I love traveling.
What would you say is the recommended tip for a hotel maid who has to clean up vomit on just about every surface of a hotel bathroom?
That pizza at 1 am literally tasted like I was eating an angel
He did 5 five hand stand push ups and took off his shirt for a barbarian flex. Some girl took off her shirt and threw it at him
We could have mediocre awkward sex or mediocre stunted/awkward/uncomfortable banter. The possilities are relatively finite
I don't know what to do about my nipple.
I forgot what I was gonna say, but I'm pretty excited to not be pregnant.
come pick your gf up from my house. she's sitting in the fridge and hissing at the cat to let her eat the potatoes. btw i dont have a cat
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