why did u let me go home with him last night?
u were determined it was a good idea
he quoted Bring It On. It's over.
trying to fathom saturday night and the fact that Rainn Wilson now hates me. my brain hurts.
Granted, we were all high and wasted, but the fact that she thought we couldn't see her making out with the charles in charge lookalike bc she was holding up a pillow in front of them is a little ridiculous
Did he look more like 80s Charles in Charge or the old one that had that VH1 show? It makes a difference.
You give one guy a hand job and suddenly everyone wants to get with you
PS- did you die? If you did just text "dead" to me, so that I know.
I think this dress is screaming I want a birthday 3some with two moderately attractive guys. I hope.
Terrible. Enormous nipples with a small ring of boob on the outside. It looked like a tittie eclipse
They're having chugging contests. With juice. Please get me out of Utah.
Slut skills are useful in every country.
Do you know what's great about Canada?..... There will always be a Tim Hortons on my walk of shame route
I just said "okay we have 20 minutes to get each other off, ready... Set... Go!" and he picked me up and threw me on the bed. I almost came just from that.
Adults smoke weed in footie pajamas man. You just gotta accept me for who I am.
NO. FUCK YOU. I HOPE SOMEONE REPLACES YOUR LUBE WITH HOT SAUCE.
Fun fact: the guy I banged last night. His middle name on his birth certificate is "Windstorm."
Randomize
