dats a huuuuuge bitch!
who is this????
I'm sorry that you just had your first misguided homo experience
textsfromlastnight.com keeps rejecting me
that alone proves you never get laid, nor have a life.. or have anything funny to contribute to the world.
good news, i'm not pregnant. bad news, i had sex with ***** last night and i think i'd rather be pregnant
i found a dude playing guitar on the portapotty
my iphone just auto-corrected drink to drnknghhhg...
Your sister got a Brazilian yesterday. It looks great
there is just no excuse for touching your mothers vagina.
Because the last time i saw or spoke to him he came all over me in a hammock.
just fought my dog for the chicken pie I dropped on the floor.
Until last night, I had never actually thrown up ON a sandwich
So apparently someone caught him as he was falling. And carried him around the rest of the night.
I mean, except for the part where I was vomiting up pineapple and hot sauce, it was a really fun time.
So my step mom just informed me she tells stories about me at work as a form of birth control for the girls that work there, not sure if i should be offended or proud.
I was looking at your nipple and it made me think of you
Well I hope so...
Randomize
