I am at a striph cluv. They are ovealls everywhere. I have hot rock botto.
i must've hopped out the car and eaten some leaves...even when your'e drunk that's not acceptable
Doing blow at 6am to "wake myself up for clinicals" was a baaaaad idea
As a general rule, drunkenness and gymnastics do not mix.
He had seven beers and tap-danced on the table like a pro. HOW DOES HE DO IT
Lying on this bed is like lying on love and marshmallows and joy
Theres a point where you stop and say hey....as high as I am on LSD right now ...I`m just a man covered in paint
The only reason I can fathom that you've been able to continue to date new people this long is that women continue to become of age each year, and the younger ones don't know any better.
I was unconscious Saturday for like 6 hours after I passed out on the sidewalks of our nation's capital. Thank you America, for bottomless brunch.
I don't care how hot she is, her cat has pissed on me twice.
... drunk me broke the coffee table?
STOP TALKING ABOUT YOURSELF IN THE THIRD PERSON. YOU DID THE THING.
Tacos and sex are way better than any anti depressant pill ever was. I think I made a medical discovery here.
If you find my integrity anywhere, please tell it to come back home
can we not speak foreign languages when I'm on drugs
Just packed vodka and spare underwear into my purse- totally set for watching the hockey with him tonight
Randomize
