I drank enough to make her look pretty . . It worked and i threw up while going at it
I mean I woke up wearing my bathing suit which blows my mind
they would be such cute babies and they would grow up to have huge dicks. and that would make me proud as a mother
One last question would your parents let me sleep in your bathtub for the night?
He was like a foghorn with a huge penis.
If this wasn't a work function my tits would be out already.
NOT EVEN KIDDING RIGHT NOW. THE GUY IN THE SPIDERMAN COSTUME JUST FELL OFF THE ROOF INTO A BABY POOL. GET HERE NOW!!
It was total unicorn galloping on a fucking rainbow awesome.
He held back my hair as I puked, then kindly asked me to slightly move my head over and pissed right next to my face.
He looked like he was trying to woo a lady version of himself by playing goblin music on his guitar.
I just want to nap and funnel a bottle of wine in a cute dress
Did you really just reference your penis in a pep talk? I think I may love you more now.
I'm getting paid to get fucked up. How much better could this get?
On a brighter more disgusting note...... I think I just shart myself but I'm too afraid to find out.
My roommate made maccoroni last nigh dropped the bowl off the counter knocking it into the dog bowl he picked up the dog bowl and started eating it claiming it was te worst Mac and cheese ever and if he wasnt so high he would stop eating it hahahaha
Randomize
