Whats up?
Drunk as a mother trucker with panties on her thumbnail..laying thee down
Stay up. I'm coming home in a little
Ill try..hurry!!!! Thine hour awaits you
Call me when you're up
Great dream, you were in it
i think i have two assholes
i blame lastnights decisions on friday the 13th
My choices this week make me realize that I need to copyright the term "cock buffet"
In the middle of switching positions, we shared a line of coke. It's was like a modern-day 'Lady and the Tramp.'
was it good sex?
i mean it was good for how drunk we were. and for how big the closet was
is pulling out brownies in the middle of class on 4/20 just too obvious?
Security said no more parties of this kind. To me that translates to Theme party this weekend.
I have her designated blowjob hair tie on my wrist. It's like a key to eternal happiness
Somebody found our where I was and called the bar looking for me. When the bartender called my name I finished my beer and took off like a fugitive.
I'm using toast as a chaser. If I wasn't already so fucked up this would be revolting.
Also he didn't buy condoms after we ran out last week. Luckily I had one, but I told him he should be more optimistic about getting laid
80% sure the drag queens carried her home
I thought my holiday spirit was gone this year until I got banged to Christmas music. It's back.
Randomize
