belinda wants 2 know wr u got ur butt pads
i dont wear butt pads that thang is au naturel
Yeah...right...LMAO
i scrubbed and i scrubbed and i scrubbed and i still was a whore
he was holding his dick in one hand and my boob in the other and i looked down and thought, this is my life
If a vagina could give out awards, you should be preparing an acceptance speech.
I woke up spooning with a broom that someone taped a mustache too..i need to stop starting my nights by drinking "hangover" wine.
Dude if it is ever said "everybody get inside the police helicopter just showed up.". That means it was a successful party.
Everyone is now just referring to it as "the night Hannah couldn't get laid" so needless to say you didn't miss much
Some old bald man is a 100,000 dollar Audi sports car just revved his engine at me and held out his phone at me trying to get my number. I hate the valley.
Just got a Lifeproof case for Christmas so hold on and tell me how my shower nudes look
I had to bail out of the tour de Franzia because I have class Saturday morning. Grad school is ruining my life
Fuck me first. Then we can craft and watch Terminator 2.
I wanna hang out. The cats don't talk back.
They're giving you narcotics aren't they?
If I offered to share would you come visit me?
like, there were so many other better not terrible choices you could have made, so i'm honestly baffled that you managed to fuck up that bad
I honestly think sometimes all you need is a $2 alcoholic punch poured from a jug into a big glass to feel better. I guess abblebees is my new problematic fav
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