Yeah, i don't remember peeing. or meeting the girl.
Where are I am going home with Ryan
I don't know who this or Ryan is but it is probably too late to talk you out of it
Do you know my vagina holds 14 pints of water?
If I die tonight, I want you to know that your sister is awesome in bed
we were having sex and the sweat made her make up run... seriously laid there and watched her face just melt into ugly.
After skinny dipping in your pond, I think me and tequila have added a whole new dynamic to our relationship.
We got a Christmas tree, decorated it to surprise his wife And kids who were out of town for her father's funeral, then fucked like rabbits on their new mattress before he had to pick them up at the airport.
Just to be safe, you should be prepared to jump out of a second story window
He compliments me like a gay guy and fucks me like a starved nympho. I'm in love.
She started crying and told me to leave half way through, I'm walking down main with a bottle of patron and a sweatpants boner.
this better not be you asking for a beej
I just laid my head on this pillow and I smelt your penis. It was comforting.
Oh you have the munchies, Dad? That's great and congratulations on the weed but STOP EATING MY APPLE PIE
I wish you looked at me the way you looked at my brothers penis
What the World Series means to me is that I've slept with too many giants fans.
Quit bitching. I brought you a muffin.
Randomize
