Yo dont text me then not text me
I'm totally gay for Miss Californiaaaaaa
oh sweet, sweet irony
and she's shaped like a lego person so that's not happening
um i just went through the in-n-out drive thru and meant to ask for my cheeseburger animal style. turns out what i actually said was, can i get that cheeseburger doggy style? been a rough weekend.
I'm pretty sure if an eight year old calls you a whore.. it's true. just saying.
she said she'd get any tattoo I wanted ... so she's getting a large crossword puzzle as a tramp stamp. I'm the Einstein of doggy style
Maybe STDs were invented to keep stupid people from having kids.
Ya he's alive. Apparently he's been drinking Naty and listening to Unbreak My Heart on repeat all day.
Oh yes there is. Now I'm the sad one. Please organize my life. And I will demoralize yours.
HES DOING PULLUPS BE STILL MY BEATING HEART
Cuz I feel like I ate the whole candy isle at 7/11 last night and chased it with rum
You pretty much did tho
who are you talking about my vagina to?!
You tried to order fondue take-out.
From Taco Bell.
the bright side of moving is at least my Tinder options will refresh
Fuck man, I am really high rn and all I've eaten is different forms of pie
Randomize
