Sweet. Might not hurt to poop on the floor anyway.
just woke up with an anonymous loaf of bred in my bed and a piece in my mouth. this says alot about my life.
I ate one of your animal crackers. just one. ok four. but no frosting. ok frosting.
You seriously looked at the house acorss the street and implied that you thought they had nice Easters.
I thought she was being abused so tried to go in at the sympathy angle, but the bruises were from pole dancing. I went in at all angles.
It was like an alcohol war zone and you left a soldier behind.
According to this USDA thing I just read, I should either get upper respiratory issues or begin to bleed from my nose and mouth.
Oh wow. I almost tweeted #TweetFromTheBackOfACopCarTuesday but I didn't think it was that appropriate
I dreamt of sea otters and your boobs. My two favorite things.
It took me half an hour to realize I didnt know them
My stripper pole led lights flash with the sound so it's awsome with music
He fell asleep cradling my ass and every time I moved he adjusted his hand accordingly. I've found the one.
We are gonna have a bake sale and the preceded will go towards the abortion
I woke up and there is a small Irish man playing call of duty in my room. Discuss.
Too high to wash a dish but just high enough for a kitchen fire
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