i'm sick of taking my pants off and seeing a look of disappointment on the girls face. i want her to be frigthened
yah i'm on my way- is everything ok?
i'm holding a walmart bag of my own hot vomit that i closed up with some random chicks hair tie. we r pretty fucking far from ok
This is even worse then that time I fucked a guy just because he had air conditioning.
No it was after you showed us his fraternaty letters shaven out of your pubes
Vodka shot parachutes
Fucking utilizing a thrid story dorm room
in the middle of fucking he asked me if i had gotten a haircut because he noticed i didnt have split ends anymore. i dont know what to think
Currently smoking a blunt with my one night stand's mom. I don't know how I should feel about this.
They make twin pack pregnancy tests for girls like us
I remember because you made a pirate noise when you came.
Is it just me, or do you see your penis in that hand?
If you were more comfortable around gay men, then you too could get wasted at the gay dance club and go home with hot girls.
Okay who let me pass out in a recliner cuddling a pitbull and a cardboard cutout of Orlando Bloom
Best day ever, my junk is bigger than Kate Uptons boyfriends. Yay for Fappening day!
I refuse to believe this is a lapse in my dick hunting skills. It's gotta be the gods playing a game.
New holiday tradition. Eat all the Xanax in the am, then wake up later after festivities and eat all the leftovers
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