he kept looking at my chin until i asked why, then he just said he was making sure his balls didnt leave a mark.
I feel like our bond is deeper now that we're both sleeping with married men. now we're really bffls
his facial hair looked like he just ate out someone's ass
We're exchanging pot brownie recipes in my substance abuse class. This is going to be an awesome 7 weeks.
The only thing i was looking forward to on 4th of july was the google logo and they let me down. That and beer, lots and lots of beer
I lost count after the 4th body shot but I think I'm wearing at least 3 different peoples clothes.
LOOK AT MY HAIR, DOES THIS LOOK LIKE THE HAIR OF A PERSON WHO HAS HER LIFE TOGETHER?
Remember that time you bought snap bracelets on Amazon and they sent you 300 pregnancy tests instead? Amazon knows.
.It's like gods test of willpower against vaginal comfort
Drank your wedding present. Sorry
I somehow turned head, shoulders, knees, and toes into a sobriety test
a guy messaged me on POF to ask if I knew of any places that were hiring. And was being completely deadass serious. I'm so done
I said I wanted pizza tattoo on my ass and the tattooist asked me what I wanted on it.
At 10 PM you were shit faced in the kitchen makin nachos... Naked. I wasn't sure what to do besides walk away...
I realized my soar muscles form the shape of me leaning over a toilet
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