; Think of how many worthless people would b non existant if there was no liquor so their parents never hooked up
Now it won't go down.
You've got a gift.
They should make Glad Forceflex condoms.
Can we just schedule bi-weekly fucks and bypass all the bullshit?
I'm pretty sure if an eight year old calls you a whore.. it's true. just saying.
If I come over right now will you promise to distract your grandpa in the morning so I don't have to do the walk if shame with 1940's style judgement?
Thank GOD those kids were having a lemonade stand, I didn't have anything to wash down my plan b with.
Also on a more serious note, what says pull my hair more: straight or soft curls?
I've decided to dedicate my life to finding out which flavor of Gatorade tastes best after you brush your teeth
i came so hard i kicked through my windshield
I think I'm a wingman for every guy who bangs a girl I scarred in highschool.
There would be some who claim I got a little "carried away" or that we "probably don't need that many jello shots". They would be wrong.
I've never had someone so bad at kissing. It was like he was trying to block my airway with his tongue and he succeeded...
Its was awkward last year cuz in the middle of it her mom bust In the room with noise makers and champagne
welp, we watched the human centipede high last night and my mind literally shut down, when i came to all i could hear was mel saying EAT EAT HIS SHIT
Randomize
