Of course we end up in a gay bar... And I have to tell you there are some hot dudes here, should I pass around your Facebook?
How did you manage that?
Told her it wasn't GENITAL herpes... just ORAL herpes... on my penis
lol... jersey girls rock
Pretty sure God shed a tear when I put 15 singles in the collection plate.
I guess I'm in a committed relationship. We just had shot 1 of 3 of Gardasil. I'm now dead inside.
She wanted to make popcorn, but the air-popper was broken. So she dumped the entire container of kernels into the clothes dryer. Drunk movie night was a success!
I saw a picture of my dad holding my legs in a kegstand. Town festival=success.
I think all the stress in my life right now can be directly correlated with never winning a game of Bop It as a child.
Sex obviously provides more sustenance than oatmeal.
i just want a position where we can lock up like some sort of sexual megatron and go the whole night that way
Bjs and tacos. That's my life.
I just ordered cookies for delivery. My life is falling apart.
Talking to a customer about getting high and staring at glow in the dark wheels while there is a cop in the store. Just another day in Tampa
I think you're literally the first guy to ever pick up a chick from pinterest.
Had a very good bday. Have the teeth marks and bruises to prove it
I may or may not be drunker than time right now.
Randomize