you were trying to give my penis an indian burn.
call of duty 2 was the straight man's twilight
I jsut got pulled over and passed the sobritaty test.
Good thing spelling doesn't count.
You leave a trail of fuck everywhere you go
there are people swimming in the fountain next to the library... hello senior week
she's unstoppable after she starts doing shots and yelling NANNER
I found him in his pink and white boxer out side the dorm hall and the only thing he said was "it wouldn't let me in"
Welp, I can cross "making out with a guy in a dress" off my bucket list...
Next time a party gets busted lets get a group photo first.
right now I need to figure out a smart way to get an accurate picture of his dick so I know what in dealing with, right now in flying blind.
Nahh no judgin. Compliments to the balls are always heartfelt
You gave me a bottle of tequila and introduced me to a ginger named cowboy. I actually love you.
Do you know anything about how the saran wrap ended up on my toilet seat?
Step 1 was make out with him. so now we just need to come up with step 2.
Dennis picked up a 50 year old woman. Then he and Dan got in a fight and jumped out of the limo. No one knows what happened to them.
Randomize
