the entire time we were hooking up i couldn't stop thinking about the bengals. thoughts?
Do you like marathons because that's how long I plan on fucking you.
four days late. damn you, makeup sex. you win again.
Wow, you know I need to stop drinking alone when I pour my drink into my hand and offer it to my dog,
So my prents justed posted "DO NOT DISTURB" on facebook and i just heard their door shut and lock...I'm leaving
I made her cum... she sounded like Ray Romano
So help me Jesus we're never drinking together again. But weekends don't count. Amen.
Sign out of Gchat. Right now my gchat list is entirely girls I've slept with.. and you. You are fucking up my gchat chi.
Haha jealous. If I could remember my dreams I'm pretty sure they would constantly be about being drunk in foreign countries
Just realized that St. Patty's is on a Saturday this year in case you were interested in coming to New York and redefining bender with me.
okay i am so sorry that i pulled a knife on you last night but seriously that woman knows how to throw a party.
Nothing like playing hide and seek with a state patrol officer early in the morning to get your heart rate up.
He stopped responding after the animal pictures... I do this EVERY TIME.
I was going to try being motivated today. But then I took a hit while still in bed.
Thanks for listening. You're the first guy I've ever worked with who I didn't want to fuck.
Randomize
