i went to toss her salad and she had a toilet paper clinger on one of the hairs
in the middle of it he kept shouting: im going to be masturbating to this for the rest of my life
I thought we agreed, no more super glueing action figures to my dick
ugh he was not leaving in the morning so i tried to scare him by crying and saying i wasnt ready to lose my virginity.
she said i was like a little lamb and she felt bad for luring me into her den of sin. then she blew me.
Being a virgin isn't supposed to be this easy for you.
I'm figuring, since someone shoved pizza crust in my ear last night, there might be some leftover pizza.
Then she said I give the best mouth hugs and bar went silent.
I couldn't tell if they ere dancing or fucking but they won the costume contest
Just watched two people have sex in the pool. Hope you enjoy your yeast infection courtesy of the comfort inn.
I deserve to be covered in dicks
Goodnight Shia. Goodnight Moon.
I mean, if you want to light yourself on fire for maximum accuracy, far be it from me to stop you
I have no idea what to do with myself since we graduated.
I've just been napping and sexting all day.
Well, I hope you're having fun. I'm just gonna lay here and wait for death - shouldn't be long now.
I would climb him like a jungle gym. Enthusiastically and creatively.
Randomize
