I'm sure it was awkward. I've never had a professor expose parts of them to me before.
I tried to show my boob for free volcano tacos at taco bell last night. Not boobs. Just boob. The manager wasn't allowing it.
We couldn't find him for like 4 hours. Turns out he was sitting under a tree and had thrown his phone in a lake because he couldn't figure out how to unlock it. Freshmen.
Apparently I covered myself in sunscreen before I went to bed. Im just assuming that due to the fact I found an empty bottle of sunblock
You were talking about masturbating on the phone then said you had to go because golden girls was on then you called me back saying you seen that episode already.
I think I died last night. I had 14 beers..well 13 1/2 if you count the one that got spilled on the baby in the elevator.
Ice skating? Did you see me last night? I don't even know where my socks are
He called me on my way to the bathroom and told me he wanted to hear me pee my beers out... That. Drunk.
You aren't going to like my movie choice because it's a Disney movie, but I am cordially inviting you to the couch for blowjobs.
New found love of volunteering, when there's free wine available at all times. Good times. And I get to to feel good about helping people.
Is the mullet a good, great, or horrible idea before we leave for college
No judgement. Sometimes you gotta twerk on a legends face.
where did we go last night? there's dollar bills all over my room & they're all wet.
So adding to the list of things my boobs can do, sweeping with a broom is apparently a thing.
Whats a little breast milk between friends?
Randomize
