I am going to fall madly in love with a ginger, marry the ginger and have lil ginger children running all around town. Oy
You shut your mouth
he's my edward cullen
I am pretty sure Edward Cullen never had an all-day drinking binge topped off with some blow.
i literally paused in the middle of it, turned on my light, pointed to the picture netxt to my bed and go "you hooked up with my roommate too!!! AWWW!" he was so weirded out. i don't think he understands the relationship we have..we share..
my stepmom is let-the-dog-eat-out-of-her-mouth drunk. oh my god.
Just watched a guy puke off his bike. Beyond impressed. He didn't even swerve
Yo plow her in the living room were all outside tommy wants to see
I am too high to deal with coming home to 11 naked people in my living room
he spent an hour trying to rescue a bug from the sink. turned out to be a sesame seed.
I'm literally in my bed still trying to find the energy to take my corset off so I can binge eat oreos
I am so disappointed that he didn't steal a Christmas tree last night.
im gonna shove his purity ring down his throat
The boob job was worth every penny just to see the expression of pure joy on his face the first time he saw them.
how do you know everyone's mad at you?
I just woke up feeling shameful
When we started the night I was in zebra wedges & she was in my black boots... I woke up wearing pink flip flops & the mirror on my rental is fuxked up. Wtf happened last night?
The gift for sixth anniversary is steel. He bought me handcuffs. Inee I married the right man!
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