so wait, they're fucking, but it doesn't count as cheating cause they only do anal?
What about the words "You're my personal dildo" made him say "I love you"?
i'm sending her a home depot gift card for the hole i put in her wall. call it good?
george bush was a better president for first pitches than barack obama. there. i said it.
he has been on a 2 week bender, has been homeless for a week and a half, and leaves for madagascar in 2 days. Do we worry or is that normal?
My dick is covered in produce stickers. I suspect you
Yeah he doesn't get it. We had to change the subject to Keanu reeves before someone got hurt.
All I wanted was a hug. You dirty, dirty whore.
I don't know what to say to that. All I know is my vagina is trying to jump through the phone.
Not gonna make it. My ovaries are playing laser tag
Well you ended up trying to convince two Greek girls that you were Greek, but failed massively by shouting at them in Spanish, and then almost vomiting after taking way too much snuff. Maybe lay off the guinness next time?
doing squats while I brush my teeth.. gotta keep the booty in check
If anything I look like a soccor mom going out for her annual ladies night. Trying hard, but not quite in her twenty's anymore.
it's the international house of making me almost fucking shit myself
DO NOT FUCK YOUR ENGAGED GAY NEIGHBOR!
Randomize
