she is the female version of PC from the mac and pc commercials..i'll still hit tho
frankly if you're gonna get kicked out of your place, hooking up with your gay roommate's boyfriend would be the most entertaining way to do it.
she said "i got this" and then fell on her face. within grabbing distance of the wall and her boyfriend
When you start quoting save the last dance you need to stop drinking
I think I slept in the cheesecake last night. Either that or I had a wet dream. Whatever happened I need to wash my pants.
Apparently you get kicked out of gay bars if they catch you putting the entire free condom bowl in your purse.
You should seriously consider super glueing your knees together
The power of my vagina can withstand any attempt of celibacy
OH MY GOD I JUST WANT TO GO HOME AND FART ALL NIGHT.
I'm pretty sure you and I ate the entire Keebler elf weed workshop
In other news: I found out that my mom used to fuck my newest fuck buddy's dad when they were in school.
I slapped him but he didn't wake up. He just nuzzled my head, hugged me closer, and smiled.
The name of the man in your bed is not Ryan. I can't remember what his name is but that is wrong
I just hooked up with a one legged Australian guy. Hooray diversity!
I'm sorry you're hurting. Would a picture or my erect penis help?
Sorry I missed your birthday party. I caught a dick and rode it to O-Town
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