I can't watch pbs sober anymore
He's not gay. He just has bad gaydar and he gaydared himself and was wrong.
he broke up with me while standing outside, half naked, waiting to fuck him. i feel like a leper right about now.
Vaginas are confusing as hell with all their secret compartments and shit.
I'll get my vaginal cartography poster.
i'm gonna start fucking more girls with asthma. help feed my ego.
guy just got out of the car at the drive in and told his girlfriend "fuck you and your taco" and walked off
you said you wanted to feel how much my penis weighed for educational purposes
WHAT IF you could get pizza delivered to you IN YOUR CAR while driving somewhere. Like moving roadside service.
You're High aren't you?
Sooooo high
One day. I will touch his hair. I'm curious if it'll be like a soft cloud.
bro, your right, i shouldn't feel embarrassed about taking shots from a penis-shaped ice sculpture
There was confetti in my vomit this morning... Happy New Year!!
I know where his drugs are but not my pants
I think when your throwing up on the highway on the way to pick up your mom from the airport is a sign to slow down.
I never thought I'd be on my couch watching Star Trek, getting my tits rubbed while crying.
Whats a little breast milk between friends?
Randomize