whatever. i fb stalked him and his pic comments are witty. so i'm going for it.
some how when im high sleep beats hunger...its like how paper beats rock it doesnt make any fucking sense but it still happens
..and then spiked the maple syrup at iHop
I cannot believe how calm you were last night about telling Katie she was on fire.
i wish i could shrink down to the size of his dick so i could just thank it in person.
I just had a 30 minute fake cell phone conversation with myself just to avoid hooking up with the drunk guy next to me. its like an art form.
you kept looking at stripers and saying " Go to College"
I feel that shower jager is exactly what this man needs after last night.
You're a disgrace to gay men everywhere.
Stop studying come to the bar get drunk and help me figure out how to get home pretend there are commas in there someplace
So I woke up really sad and then I looked in the cabinet and there was weed and now I'm not sad anymore
Tinder date just called. I was supposed to be there 30 minutes ago but I'm on a 27 game win streak in Park...?
Fuck that man! Tell her your dog died or something. Reschedule that shit, you can't stop 2K at a time like that. Ball is life bro... Priorities.
She's one of those people who could be either 16 or 23. In which case she's too old for me or in dangerously jailbait territory for you, bro.
He was shirtless in my yard saying he was jesus
The cops asked Ben if he was drunk and he slurred "I'm man enough to admit that I am" with a southern draw
Why is my belly button ring in my ear
Randomize
