these pics are all outta focus - was this what the camera saw? or what your eyes saw?
i'm drinking out of my 'black like my president' mug
If he comes back to you and I'm left alone in lonelytown I'm totally going to poo on your car.
he just found out the funeral is this morning so i'm wearing last night's clothes and look like a total slut.
I've been crying in my room listening to Billy Joel for 2 hours. Thank God Four Loko was banned.
does she really think making her boyfriend delete me on facebook is going to magically stop us from hooking up?
I can't believe I had to convince you to not drink butter.
She is high at the bar - she thinks the bottle of frangelico is aunt jemima telling her to stop doing drugs.
I got to explain to the guys at work today how i had no choice but to go to a gay bar because I was handcuffed to a lesbian.
I literally just wiped coffee off of the corner of my mouth with my boob because my hands were full. Thought youd be proud. Good morning!
I wish I could just hang out in ERs.
You left a motherfucking bruise. ON MY TIT. How? How do you even. No.
if jesus wore shoes made out of pure flavor and hurricane kicked u in the face thats how it feels to eat pizza bites right now
This is not okay. I only like one boy. I should like 200 boys and be having wild unprecedented sex. Instead I like one boy whose a born again virgin.
So how often do you needs to see my tits today then?
Randomize
