My vagina is in bus station locker number 1465.You can go talk to it if u like -in the mean time I’m going 2show up drunk and embarrass u at work.
Do you have any idea how hard it is to cum to Chingy?!
Ps if we're still living vicariously through each other, you had sex on a beach last night
shes still here... layin in my bed watching a beyonce concert on tv drinking leftover franzia straight outta the bag and crying
you were sat in the corner crying until someone gave you a baguette, which you then tried to feed to the duck doorstop.
I regret nothing
I feel like i'm walking on a never-ending field of baby sheep.
I saw your relationship status and wanted to write "Now you can fuck with some peace of mind that she isn't giving that other guy she met online a handjob."
I don't remember but we shouldn't have a problem. Unless drunk you encouraged drunk me not to wear a condom.
I think we have a problem.
Is it frowned upon to bring a flask to the er?
I asked what you thought of her and you replied not the biggest I have had
I might as well just sew it shut at this point.
The dude we met that gave us weed sent me a video of his balls covering the sun like a solar eclipse
I think next time I give head I'm gonna try making the chewbacca noise.
I look forward to it
I’m doing tequila shots with lesbians. This isn’t how I planned my night but I’m not complaining
sam was dropping a deuce next to me. wrote me a note that said "glad we shared this experience." passed it under the wrong stall. the other guy picked it up. that's all I know so far.
Randomize
