After I talked about my ex for about twenty minutes, she just listened, sluts are so understanding
there was a trapeze. enough said
If God had a period, it would result in diet faygo redpop
The trip involved octopus tentacles coming from the little holes in my TV's speakers. The beauty of the nonexistant symbolism had me in tears.
Believe it or not I'm actually not the only person sitting in the back of the train covered in glitter and drinking whiskey out of an arizona iced tea can. Small world.
I wore water proof eyeliner just incase the first picture of me of 2012 is a mugshot
Hey I know you're not home, but I'm here. Your front door is unlocked and someone took shit on your doormat...
Just wanted to say a big ole FUCK YOU for coming out to mom the day before I have to drive with her for 6 hours. Ass hat.
Sex is always the answer.
Especially if the question is: what have I not had this year?
She said to me, without hesitation, "make me an offer better than my sugar daddy and I'll go with you"
He went down on me to the national anthem being sung by Jordan sparks. It was very patriotic of him
Why is everyone giving me a hard time for drinking?!
Your in the library.
I have acquired a mango...tonight is successful so far
Her name is susan
You were telling everyone in the bar that Jess gave you scurvy.
Btw you guys passed out eating DP dough and watching Pocahontas... on a monday
it was stoner heaven..
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