Don't be scared. It'll feel very good. And you'll be clean afterwards. I'm growling right now.
spencer pratt says his family invinted chess
that kid is like the al gore of hollywood.
Im starting to realize why people dont masturbate while driving
My vagina hasn't been this smooth since I was 8. I better get laid tonight.
I want nothing more to get stoned and go to your little sisters petting zoo party but I need to have priorities
I'm not sure which one did it but one of them fucked the kink out of my neck
in my defense i said 'lock up your wives' before going out.
I think my hookup is starting to fall for me. Time to break his heart.
you 2 were alone in the living room and the dog walked in and you started yelling what are all these people doing in here
Of all the things that can be stripped of me i'll be damned if it's my vanity
You're asking your pregnant booty call to go to a funeral with you?
She sleeps with her hand around my balls. First I thought it was just a comfort thing. Now I think it's to make sure I can't slip away in the middle of the night.
Was just messaged by someone in a Power Ranger suit on OkCupid... Figured you would approve
On another note; I'm three days away from being 1/12th of my way from not having sex for a year. I need to get laid.
I'm only friends with her because I can't stop watching the train wreck.
Randomize
