WTF why am I in the Atlanta airport?
I can't believe I wasted a google wave invite on her.
my ex just saw me in his brothers bed. fuck yes revenge feels good
today is monday, i feel like we should do something illegal
Quick question... Can I call you daddy? Or would that just really made the whole 8 year age gap a bigger deal...?
I may only be a second year med student but I feel very confident in calling that a micropenis.
The security guard told you that the room was off limits and you just looked at him and said,"Its okay, I have a beard".
hey tell your friend im sorry for licking his mouth, that was probably inappropriate
You need to stop having girl talk with the guys I'm sleeping with.
Please stop hiding condoms in my house. If I want to have sex with you, I will let you know. FYI, my mom found the ones hidden behind the milk. She was not happy.
She wanted me to watch her masterbate and after she thanked me for a wonderful evening and left. This state is weird.
Why do I think he'd like to keep my hair in a box?
They're magnificent. It's like god made her last but hadn't fulfilled his boob quota.
My kid made a secret wish that you have a baby... Make good choices today!
It might look like I curled my hair last night but it's just the jiz.
Randomize
