I actually told the people in the movie theatre to give me a cup and I would dip water from the toilet before I paid $4.50 for a bottle of water.
i finished masturbating and realized my blackberry had accidentaly called my grandmother in my pocket during it. awkward...
Its a sad when the highlight of your day is flicking a booger and actually getting it to stick to your computer monitor.
Going to pass out with da shoes on. hugging wallstreet journal from tuesday. please check me for liveliness in the morning.
her and i fucked to a michael jackson song and she had it memorized so she squealed every time he did
It got kind of awkward when her dad brought home a 20 something asian girl at 3am
Well let's just say that she ended up trying to get it in with the wheelchair guy, who btw, can get an erection and quickly I might add
Leave the bottle at home cause either way I'm not taking another shot. You have no idea how long it took me to compose this text free of grammatical error.
Gold star for you, but I'm on my way and the soco is buckled in next to me. This is happening.
The last thing I remember is teaching our waffle house waitress to do the stanky leg and promising the grill cook we would come see him at his other job.
Look, I'm just saying... paying ur respects to the neighbors who had a death in the family with food u steal from the neighbors having the cookout may result in a negative karma situation.
Please come home, i don't want to feel like basket garbage girl but I'm in your alleyway and not sure how to change that.
Okay. This morning the comforter was wet, you were underwearless and using a tiny blanket. What'd you do??
just passed my midterm while getting a blow job. i love going to school online
Kind of like the new iOS 10 because I can send sexts with fireworks or confetti. Really gets the point across
Every time I try to do something productive I end up searching ghost porn.
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