Instead of having sex, we spent the entire night making pillow forts and have sword fights. I think I'm in love
she went to type in rate my professors and rate my pussy came up in my recent searches. needless to say, i will likely be masturbating to the aforementioned site tonight.
Ordered weed last night from the delivery service, and who showed up...my old real estate broker. He said, "this is less stressful." Duh.
the bar told me i would have to take an hour break so they could wash the shot glasses
You peed in the parking lot while a car was was waiting behind us. And when people walked by you proceeded to say "careful you might slip"
Seriously he's so hot. And it's so hard to flirt with a deaf guy
Normal vaginal pH: 3.8 to 4.5. Of course it tastes like a 9-volt. I could run a potato clock on that thing.
You should offer shots at parent teacher conferences..I bet more ppl come
and you stopped teaching...why?
It was fun, but I mean, any day that starts with shower tequila is bound to be good.
And after that you guys started calling arbor mist "breakfast juice"
A valentines day commercial would come on while I'm masturbating...
And he listens to me when I talk to him like the hulk.
He and I didn't so much date, as watch cartoons and go down on each other.
Casey, if you want the continuing love of our mother, you're gonna need to stop drunk texting her from PCB.
Uhm I have a bottle of tequila, a gallon of orange juice, and leggings. Now ask me again how hard im going? And that doesn't cover tomorrow.
Randomize
