it felt like I walked into a Tool Academy challenge
my underwear are soaked with white zifandel yet i have continued to wear them despite the fact im at home
No period for spring break; use this wisely.
wait can you just look around please? that was my favorite bra and i've already asked like 3 other guys
He is passed out on the kitchen floor. He will fight you if you disturb him. Just a warning.
We decided we needed a drinks fridge in our bathroom.
TO ALL WHO WERE IN MY HOUSE LAST NIGHT: WHOEVER STOLE MY BONG AND PUT IT ON THE ROOF WILL BE PAYING MY HOSPITAL BILL FROM LAST NIGHT.. AND BUYING ME A NEW, SWEETER BONG.
I did, I'm just saying. Once the drinking starts my nipples are no longer my control.
Totally forgot Mike has only one ball. Is it sad I'm excited to see it? Or shall I say the lack of it?
He sat down, pointed at my Converse and said "I have the same shoes." I thought "I'm going to have sex with you by the end of the night."
I woke up sick this morning, maybe sucking a random dudes finger at a bar last night wasn't that clean of an idea.....
I put a bagel at the end of my bed so every time I want a bite I have to do a sit up
Idk woke up on the suite in someone else's clothing and actually broke my ankle
Found a pic on my phone from last night. You're drunk. Arm wrestling some guy. In the bar bathroom. At a baby changing station. It's my new wallpaper.
dont ever go to laser tag drunk. you will be judged.
Randomize
