ive never been so in love with another man before, in a totally none sexual way... no homo
fuck, i never want to drink again I drunk dialed matt last night and broke up with him the second night in a row. FUCK QUADFEST
You told the cops that they couldn't arrest you because they weren't hot enough to fuck
I know it is almost summer when the students in my night class start showing up drunk.
He soundtracked our prebreakup sex, our breakup, and out postbreakup sex. At least he's dedicated.
apologized to him about 10 times for being drunk. told him about 15 times that he was "really pretty"
Was in the middle of a keg stand, the frat guys dropped me, and I broke my nose. My mom didn't enjoy that call from the hospital.
I have to sanitize my nipples and its just to cold in here for it to be ok
Just say the word and u can be elbow deep in this glorious rack
This is why I love you...
I have no idea what that means but I'm googling things just so I can watch my thumbs move
You called me a pussy and continued to eat an entire jar of peanut butter with only your hand.
He may be engaged to someone else, but god damn that was the best 3 hours I've ever spent naked with someone.
I gave her two orgasms and then we laid there and she ate jelly beans out of my belly button...that girls a keeper
Oh and ps....i was sleeping soundly until i woke up by the sound of amy on the phone with her mom sobbing hysterically because she cant stop having the shits.
I only gave you one rule about using the beach house: don’t get cum on anything!
You’ve seen my tits! You had to know that rule was unrealistic! Does it help that he was really cute?
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